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lyrics

It all started on a summer night, at a shady seaside saloon
A man walked in, sat down at our table and he told us the story that was the basis of this tune.
Now we'd never seen his face before, but since he just came to port,
We decided that we should hear him out; he seemed a trustworthy sort.

Well, the governor's gold was being moved, you see, and was loaded on his ship!
The man only wanted a small cut for his trouble, he said, "Just a little bit."
Needless to say, we graciously agreed, we were lookin’ for trouble as usual.
We decided when we'd go, and also where we'd meet; the job's execution would be beautiful. (Let's Rock!)

Well there we were, at the edge of the docks, waitin’ for the guard to turn around
We saw our chance, then made our move, all without making the slightest sound!

We slithered up the plank, then down into the hold
We tore that place apart, but not one coin of gold!
We looked at one another; we all thought the same thing
How could this have happened? What were we to do?
Somebody talked, who found out, who, who!? WAS IT YOU?!

“There's nothing here! We've been sold out!”
“Something is Dread-fully wrong!”
“The man at the bar! It must have been!”
“I blame you, you brought us along!”
“Will everyone please just settle down!”
“Settle down?! We've been betrayed!”
“Well we got in, so we can get away! For a group like us this should be child's play!”

We scurried 'round the room, no other way out
We heard the footsteps coming, the guards began to shout
Our heads began to swim, what were we to do?
How could we have been trapped by these blundering buffoons?!
“We needed to form a plan right now, if not now, soon!”


(Then,) BANG BANG BANG! A knock comes to the door!
One voice, two voice, three voice, four!
“Wait, wait, I hear a fifth! And they have something to say!”
How could this have happened, it must be foul play!

(They said,) “ALL OF YOU! Put your weapons down!
You're outnumbered, you haven't got a chance, stand down!”

“It was at that moment, we formed a little plot
All it took was eyebrows, a wink and a shared thought.”

“And we said:”

We're the Dread Crew of Oddwood, who stands against us!?
Tonight we teach you a lesson! Tonight we spill your guts!
We don't care if you don't believe us, but this is how it all went down!
We flayed those pompous sons of whores, and sacked their fucking town!

If you hold your tongues, you'll get to keep them in your throats,
And if you try to fight you'll be murdered on this boat!
And when we're through with you, we'll fucking ravage all your lands!
We'll beat your bloody corpses with your children's severed hands!

We stomped off to our places, all around the room
They looked at one another, oblivious to their doom!
We all looked at each other, we then began to shout
They mustered up their arms, they thought they had a chance,
One, two, three, four, time to fucking dance!

We hacked and we slashed; fought our way back home!
Never found the treasure, but their blood's as good as gold!
We burned the dead men's carcasses and made out with their wives,
And to this very day that was the best damn day of our lives!

Yeah!

credits

from Heavy Mahogany, released April 21, 2012
Music and Lyrics by Rouba Juba

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